My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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