forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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