He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
