I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
