What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Be still, my beating vagina.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
