i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
