Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
