we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
