I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
