if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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