Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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