He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
