He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
