You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
