new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
