Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
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