bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
