imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
