I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
wanna go halves on a baby?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
