me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
