I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
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