sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
My boob is missing a layer of skin
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I feel like a drive thru vagina
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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