im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
