but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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