Moan for me like Helen Keller
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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