My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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