just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
