Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
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