I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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