every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Still dying that you shit outside
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
