I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
