OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
