Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
