my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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