We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
