I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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