I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Enjoy the penises
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
