for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Dear god my vagina.
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