I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
