How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
