I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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