well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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