everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
