take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
