She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
