your room smells of hookers.
And success
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
