I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
