Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize