I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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