I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
