I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
