Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
i've created a new STD.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Randomize
